As I was writing a letter today, the following feelings started to come
out of me and I thought I would share them with you, for what they are
worth.

On Wednesday past, a man was executed here. It was the seventh execution
this year, a record for Arizona. He had been on the row for 21 years.
What a horror - he served a life sentence, and then he was executed! He
was a friend of mine, and I do not use that term loosely. In prison
there are very few friends. Everyone looks out for himself or herself.
>From the very first day I walked onto death row he shook my hand and
welcomed me. He took me under his wing so to speak. There was a lot to
learn since this was my first time in prison. He taught me a lot about
being a convict. He had his faults, as we all do, but he was the closest
thing to a real friend I have ever had in prison. When I reflected on
him last night, I cried. The tears just rolled down my face. I could not
stop them, and they are starting to come again as I write this. There
have been 17 executions since they started up again in Arizona, but none
has affected me as this one has. My head is all screwed up over this. I
do not know why I am telling you this except that I feel comfortable
with you. I do not expect sympathy or commiseration in return. It is
such a strange and lonely feeling I am experiencing. By the way, my
friend was  a very religious person. He could recite scripture and he
would praise the Lord all the time. The last time I saw him he stated
that he was convinced that God would save him from execution. I guess
this is where he was mistaken. God may have saved him by bringing him to
Heaven, but he did not save him from the clutches of the executioner
here on earth.

The pity here is that there are a number of men on the row who are good
people who would never harm another if allowed to rejoin society. What a
waste of humanity! As I am sure my friend realized after 21 years of
waiting, when the end comes, it comes fast. It makes all the years of
waiting nothing but a faint thought amongst the myriad images that float
through the mind when an awareness dawns that all a human being has
known of we call life has been for naught. That this is what it is all
about, the last few hours and minutes until some alien liquid will
invade your system and steal from you what you have struggled to keep
alive for so many years by your pain and suffering. There is no secret
meaning or profound statement here. Just the observation that no matter
how clever you are, no matter how wonderful a person you have been, life
is measured only by the few seconds it takes before you die. And try as
you may, you can not share those few seconds with anyone. For these last
few seconds of life must be considered as just dead time.

*      *      *

Richard Rossi, 50337
Death Row
ASPC Eyman, G-42
PO Box 3400
Florence, AZ 85232
USA

March, 1999