Welcome to my world, a world people often try to understand, a world
where a man lives in a 9x6 foot cell 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Yet,
no matter what I say, or how hard I try to explain, I can ever make you fully
comprehend what a day in my life is like. And yet for you to experience
it, and to see the whole picture, you couldn't just experience it for 24
hours, or 7 days. For all that would do is cheapen the experience.
To see the whole picture, you would have to step into my world. Step
into this cage, the door slammed shut behind you for nothing around here
closes without a slam.) The guard then turns to you and says "Welcome to
your new home, where you are going to spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week,
12 months a year, till we're good and ready to put you to death." And
then take the remainder of what life you have left from you. Then and
only then, could you understand my existence.
Where one sits on a thin mattress on a steel bunk, in a tiny cage, and tries
to escape through a vision of hope. Where there's no privacy, nor peace nor
tranquility. No, those can only be found in moments of time.
For I exist in a world where seconds turn into minutes, minutes into hours,
and hours into days. Yet every second of every minute of every hour
of every day, is the same as the one that passed. Time moves yet stands
completely still.
For in my world days blend into weeks, weeks into months, and months into
years. And only the names and faces of the inmates and guards change,
but all else remains the same.
Yes, welcome to my world, for this is the world that I exist in, and thats
all I truly do, is exist day to day, week to week, month to month, year after
year.
For no one can truly call this living! Its just a mere existence in
a tiny cage, in a small prison, in a small part of this world. A world
which spins at thousands of miles per hour, around a big Sun, in a huge universe,
in a great big galaxy. For which no one really understands. Just
as you can't understand my world, a world I just exist in, a world which
changes with technology, yet remains completely the same.
Confined to a 9x6 foot cage day in and day out, left only with memories.
More bad than good, more sad than happy. For this life has brought
much suffering, heartache, and pain. And so I'm stuck, in a place in
time, left with nothing but memories of my past to deal with the best way
I possibly can.
Yes, welcome to my world, a world you truly can't envision, and you could
never possibly imagine. And even though I've shared these thoughts
with you, you still can't, and never will, fully comprehend my situation,
my life, or my existence. There is no need to try, for it just can't
be done.
Yet again, I say welcome to my world, a world that only few know, yet fewer
understand.
The CCADP offers free webpages to over 500 Death Row Prisoners
Contact us for more information.
"The Eyes Of The World Are Watching Now" This page was last updated May 1,
2003
Canadian Coalition Against
the Death Penalty This page is maintained and updated by Dave Parkinson
and Tracy Lamourie in Toronto, Canada
