Earl is a death row inmate in Alabama.  He sent us his article which follows. It was originally published in the "We Care" Newsletter, Volume 26, Number 2.
    

When Jerry Gingrich asked me to write an article about my life, I tried at first to get out of doing it and suggested some other Christian brothers who I thought would do a better job.
But Jerry didn't go for that. So after giving it some thought and prayer, I agreed to do it.
I'm not proud of my past; in fact, there is so much that  I'm ashamed of. For the past seven
and a half years, I have been living on Alabama's death row for the crime of murdering my
wife and her classmate. But praise the Lord for the goodness and grace that He gives to all
who call on the name of the Lord Jesus! "All" includes even me!

Helped by a midwife, my mother gave birth to me on August 22,1957. I have two older sisters
and one younger brother. I never knew my father who died when I was very young. For male
role models, I looked to my two uncles, both alcoholics, who had been in the army during
World War II.

My grandmother and mother raised me the best that they knew how.  I was taught good morals
and values like telling the truth, not taking things that didn't belong to me, and respecting my
elders.

But the older I became, the less important those values seemed to me. I was driven along by
a mind void of judgment. I did what I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. In the beginning,
our acts of sin may seem innocent, but they alwavs cause others around us to suffer.
I have a mother and a thirteen  year-old son who can testify to this truth very well.
I started smoking and drinking when I was about 13 years old. By the time I was 15,
I was smoking reefer. My mother worried about me  constantly. She would plead with me
not to drink and drive, but I wouldn't listen to her. Because of my stubborn ways, I received
some expensive fines for DUT (paid by my mother) and had several nasty accidents which
totaled the cars I was driving.
On Sundays we had to make a choice. Either we wOnt to Sunday school and worship service
or we stayed at home and cleaned up the whole house. I chose church. But church never did
anything for me. I tried to find fultillment in drugs, alcohol, fast cars, and women.
After graduating from high school, I followed my uncles' footsteps by enlisting in the army
where I served for four years.There I cultivated a regular habit of shooting dope. I left the
army, got married for all the wrong reasons, and joined the U.S. Coast Guard for three and
a half years.
Our marriage went from bad to worse. Eventually we separated. My wife went of to college
and I started takine classes at a technical school. I was filled with jealousy, hatred,
bitterness, self righteousness, and a murdering spirit.  One morning I went to the campus to
talk to my wife about getting back together. She didn't want to hear it and I drew a gun and
fired, killing both mv wife and her friend.

I will never forget it-the last day of my trial. That  night in my cell when I knelt and asked
God to forteive me for what I had done. I told Satan to leave and I asked Jesus to be the
Lord of my life forever. And He did just that. By His Word  I have been healed and delivered
from my destructive wavs. Is it possible  for a person to live for Jesus Christ on Death Row?
Yes, it is possible by faith. It's a matter of personal choice. Every day I must choose to see
mvself as God sees me. Otherwise I would he overcome with guilt and loneliness.  But by faith
I know that "there is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus!"
When God looks at me, he doesn't see a condemned man; he sees a forgiven man!
He doesn't see me as I was but as I am now in Christ - " a new creation; the old has gone,
the new has come!"  Or as one translation puts it  " a new species of being that never
existed before!"

My heart is fixed.  I am going to serve the Lord God with a glad heart for the abundance of
things that He has done for me.  I purpose that His Word shall be the final authority in my life.
 In return, He helps me to walk in love, to testify to His grace, and to forgive those who try to
offend me.

May the peace of God rest and rule in your heart as well.

                          Penpal Request:
I'm forty one now and it has been twelve and a half years now and my son
is eighteen and a senior in high school.  I welcome all correspondence.
With His love,

      EARL JEROME McGAHEE  Sr.  Z 466
        Holman Unit,  3700   Cell # 7 U 4
            Atmore, Alabama   36503

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